5 Tips to Help Someone Through a Faith Transition
K but like, what if a crisis of faith wasn’t actually a crisis? Hear me out. What if it was considered a natural part of human growth? What if we viewed it as a way to open ourselves up to make room for new life? Here are a few ways to help your loved one through this stage of life without straining your relationship.
5 TIPS FOR THE WHOLE FAMILY
Don’t Freak Out. When someone first opens up about their faith crisis it can be hard to not react because you are likely being flooded with all kinds of emotions. Fear. Anger. Greif. It’s all a natural response. So I’ll tell you - the best thing you can do is take a few deep breaths. It’s super important that you create a safe space for this person so they feel comfortable being honest and sharing with you again in the future. This is your chance to show that you value the relationship even more than your loved ones actions.
Just Listen. Try not to let your emotions overcome you for now. This isn’t about you. It’s about your loved one in this moment. I know it’s hard. And I need you to just sit and listen with curiosity rather than judgement.
Don’t Preach. Preaching is a guaranteed ‘shut down’ to the conversation. Preaching communicates to your loved one that you think they are doing something wrong. They don’t want an answer. They don’t want your opinion. At least not yet. Let them share without fear of judement or condecension. Remember the acronymn W.A.I.T- why am I talking? If you are starting to sound like a seminary video, shut your mouth and refer to tip #2.
Learn Something. Your friend or family member has probably developed a worldview that is likely new to you. After they have shared their piece, ask questions to learn and understand. Plan to do some of your own research. Anticipate your own doubts. And then ask even more questions. You will might even learn something new about your loved one in the process.
Preserve the Relationship. Value the person over their loss or declaration of faith. Don’t let this change come between you and your loved one. Conintue to trust them and treat them with respect. They are really going through something. You might be too. Which is totally fair. And it may be worth looking into attending your own therapy if you’re having trouble with your loved ones process.
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