7 Healthy Boundaries to Set During a Faith Transition
Faith transitions are no joke.
You may feel that your religious foundational beliefs no longer align with your personal values and bring on feelings of confusion, shame, or guilt.
You may have already decided it's time to take a step back or completely step away from you previous religious beliefs.
Friends, this may be a time of high stress or high excitement for you. You are the most important person that you can take care of. We get it! We've been there! We're here to help you out!
LET’S TALK BOUNDARIES
When leaving any faith, setting strong boundaries for yourself and what you will and will not accept is very important. They can allow you to still be around the people and places you love without compromising yourself and your new beliefs. Remember,
Boundaries are not:
Selfish
A way to avoid problems or people
Rules
Boundaries are:
Putting yourself and your mental health first
Letting others know what you will accept in your life
A way to protect yourself
7 BOUNDARIES TO START WITH TODAY
I will not talk about my reasons for leaving the church if I feel uncomfortable. You don't owe anyone an explanation. You have the right to not participate in every conversation you're invited to.
Saying no. You may be invited to participate in church activities, old family traditions, or in prayer. You have the right to say no to any invitation if the activities do not align with you new found personal values.
I am willing to talk, as long as each party is respectful of each other. When met with curiosity and kindness, you may feel welcome to open up. Perhaps, they're dealing with the same thoughts you are and need a little guidance.
Freedom to express spiritual boundaries. Your beliefs are your own, no matter how much you may or may not have in common with your family or partnership in terms of spirituality or religion. You and those around you should respect each other’s beliefs, foster and encourage each other’s spiritual growth, and be open to learning about the other’s culture or faith.
Asking for space. Sometimes we just need to be alone to unravel the emotional baggage we load on each day. This is especially true for those in a faith crisis. Alone time is perfectly healthy and a key to maintaining your own identity and sorting through your problems.
I will not take blame or feel guilty for my decisions. Any conversations with this goal are not welcome. You may get unwanted comments. And it's hard being the bigger person all the time. Feel free to walk away or leave any situation to take care of you.
7. Sticking up for yourself. You are allowed to be yourself, believe in different things, and not hide or shrink yourself and your thoughts.
Practicing healthy boundaries can take time and practice. Be patient with yourself and know being honest up front will set you up for success and emotional, spiritual, and physical health later on. While boundaries may change over time, what you need now may not be what you need in the future, holding yourself and others accountable will bring a greater peace of mind and provide a easier transition into your new life.
Learn more about faith transitions and find help here.