How to Deal with Family Comments When Going Through a Faith Transition
When going through a Mormon or LDS faith transition, you may face questions, comments, and unsolicited “advice” from family and friends. Ideally, they would inquire with curiosity and empathy because they care about you and your journey. However, it often feels like their goal is to change your mind and encourage you to stay in the religion. This can leave you feeling unheard, judged, alienated, or even shamed—a common experience during a faith crisis.
Helpful Tips for Responding to Family Comments
Comment: "Now we won’t be a celestial family."
Challenge: I don’t believe that a loving Heavenly Father breaks families apart just because they believe differently.
Comment: "You’ll never know true happiness outside of the church."
Challenge: I am truly happy, which is how I know I made the right choice for me.
Comment: "You’re choosing worldly things/the easy way."
Challenge: This was not an easy decision for me. I spent time studying and learning about myself and my spirituality before coming to this decision. Just because you only see the choice I made doesn’t mean it wasn’t a process for me.
Comment: "It’s just a phase."
Challenge: Maybe my time in the church was just a phase? It wouldn’t be progress if I learned something new and didn’t change my behavior. I am growing as a person and know what’s right for me.
Comment: "I’m praying for you."
Challenge: I really appreciate you thinking of me and my happiness. I will keep you in my thoughts as well.
Understanding Family Responses During Your Faith Transition
At the end of the day, you get to decide what works for you. While these comments may hurt, they often come from well-meaning individuals who genuinely care but lack understanding of how someone could leave a faith they hold dear. Many family members feel guilt or confusion, perceiving your decision as a failure on their part or struggling to reconcile their love for you with their beliefs about religion.
Navigating these dynamics requires patience and emotional resilience. Therapy can be an invaluable resource during this time, helping you process feelings of grief, confusion, or isolation while building tools to manage relationships effectively.
How Faith Transition Therapy Can Help
During a faith transition, counseling can provide a safe space to explore your emotions, values, and beliefs without judgment. Therapy can help you:
Reclaim agency over your life by trusting yourself and setting boundaries.
Address feelings of anxiety, depression, or loss of identity that often accompany transitions.
Connect with your core values and learn how to live authentically in alignment with them.
Navigate strained relationships with family members who may struggle to understand your journey.
Faith transition therapy is especially helpful when shifting away from external guidance—such as religious leaders—and learning to turn inward for clarity and direction. Whether you're dealing with religious trauma, an existential crisis, or simply seeking emotional support during this adjustment, therapy can empower you to create a meaningful life rooted in self-discovery.
Moving Forward With Confidence
Restructuring your beliefs is not easy, but it’s an opportunity for growth and authenticity. Remember that your faith transition is unique to you—there’s no “right” way to navigate this journey. By honoring your experiences, seeking support when needed, and trusting yourself, you can rebuild your sense of purpose and joy.
If you're ready to take the next step toward healing and clarity, consider connecting with one of our therapists trained in faith transition counseling, spiritual guidance, or navigating complex family dynamics during religious shifts.
Meeting with a therapist may help you more on an individual level. Our therapists specialize in faith transitions and can help make sense of family responses. Get in with a therapist here.